Meeting Ambiguity With Resiliency
Jamie Coulter ’87, P’21, Chair of Crescent’s Board of Governors, shared this speech at Crescent School’s Prize Day Celebrations on June 19, 2020.
Welcome to you all. I am honoured to be speaking to you in my capacity as Chair of the Board of Governors of this great place we call Crescent School. I am also a Class of ’87 alumnus and proud parent of Owen, who will be entering Grade 12 next September.
I remember vividly the moment it became apparent that COVID-19 had changed everything. On the afternoon of March 11, I boarded a flight in Calgary to return home to Toronto. By the time the flight landed, the NBA had cancelled its season, the World Health Organization had declared a global pandemic and Tom Hanks and his wife, Rita Wilson, had been diagnosed with the disease. I suppose the only good news coming out of this is that the Raptors are still the reigning NBA champs.
As a result, the school year ended differently than anyone could have imagined. While I am grateful to have the opportunity to address you today, I would have much preferred to do so in person.
I read recently an article (“The Power of Small Wins”) about how to exist in ambiguity and in particular, the uncertainty about when this crisis will be behind us. Of course, no one likes ambiguity. Think of the last time you were on a plane and take-off was delayed due to a maintenance issue. The pilot tries to give you some idea of how long the delay is going to be but the reality is always longer. That is the worst part about where we now find ourselves – we just don’t know how long we are going to be stuck on the tarmac.
Having to deal regularly with situations defined by uncertainty explains why I am such a big fan of Google Maps. Its algorithm tells me, quite accurately, how long it will take me to drive from A to B. Even better, the app tells me when to expect traffic to slow and it also allows me to see when the route changes from red to blue and I can get back up to the posted speed limit. Unfortunately, we don’t have those same insights with COVID-19. We simply don’t know when this will be behind us and so we need to be prepared for the long haul. How do we do that? The author of the article suggests we keep a couple of things in mind:
Stop looking at the clock. Forget about how long this crisis is going to last. It’s time to set small, incremental goals – weekly, even daily – and celebrate each along the way. This is called the “Progress Principle.” It is the importance of acknowledging small wins: the project that gets completed, the call that goes well, or even the tough week that’s finally over. Celebrating doesn’t have to be big, but it must be intentional – the congratulatory email, recognition on the next Zoom conference, or even a simple “thank you.”
This is a life lesson on ambiguity. Most of the things that bother me are either in the past or the imagined future. Virtually, none of them are in the here or now because we usually have a great sense of control about things as long as we feel we can see and wrestle with them. This short article nicely captures the reasons we despise ambiguity and how learning to tolerate the uncertainty of life is a choice.
So, what does this have to do with Crescent education? Well, let me take you back to Grade 7 when I first read the inspiring lines of Rudyard Kipling’s famous poem, If:
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too
While not perfectly analogous to the current situation, I think the key message of this poem is to believe in your ability to deal with adversity. I have no doubt that your time at Crescent, whether you have just finished your first year (hello Grade 3s) or your tenth (hello, Grads) will instill in you a certain resiliency. It is this aspect of character that will empower you to deal with a wide range of issues throughout your life, and not just the one we are currently living through.
I wish you all the best.
Back
I remember vividly the moment it became apparent that COVID-19 had changed everything. On the afternoon of March 11, I boarded a flight in Calgary to return home to Toronto. By the time the flight landed, the NBA had cancelled its season, the World Health Organization had declared a global pandemic and Tom Hanks and his wife, Rita Wilson, had been diagnosed with the disease. I suppose the only good news coming out of this is that the Raptors are still the reigning NBA champs.
As a result, the school year ended differently than anyone could have imagined. While I am grateful to have the opportunity to address you today, I would have much preferred to do so in person.
I read recently an article (“The Power of Small Wins”) about how to exist in ambiguity and in particular, the uncertainty about when this crisis will be behind us. Of course, no one likes ambiguity. Think of the last time you were on a plane and take-off was delayed due to a maintenance issue. The pilot tries to give you some idea of how long the delay is going to be but the reality is always longer. That is the worst part about where we now find ourselves – we just don’t know how long we are going to be stuck on the tarmac.
Having to deal regularly with situations defined by uncertainty explains why I am such a big fan of Google Maps. Its algorithm tells me, quite accurately, how long it will take me to drive from A to B. Even better, the app tells me when to expect traffic to slow and it also allows me to see when the route changes from red to blue and I can get back up to the posted speed limit. Unfortunately, we don’t have those same insights with COVID-19. We simply don’t know when this will be behind us and so we need to be prepared for the long haul. How do we do that? The author of the article suggests we keep a couple of things in mind:
Stop looking at the clock. Forget about how long this crisis is going to last. It’s time to set small, incremental goals – weekly, even daily – and celebrate each along the way. This is called the “Progress Principle.” It is the importance of acknowledging small wins: the project that gets completed, the call that goes well, or even the tough week that’s finally over. Celebrating doesn’t have to be big, but it must be intentional – the congratulatory email, recognition on the next Zoom conference, or even a simple “thank you.”
This is a life lesson on ambiguity. Most of the things that bother me are either in the past or the imagined future. Virtually, none of them are in the here or now because we usually have a great sense of control about things as long as we feel we can see and wrestle with them. This short article nicely captures the reasons we despise ambiguity and how learning to tolerate the uncertainty of life is a choice.
So, what does this have to do with Crescent education? Well, let me take you back to Grade 7 when I first read the inspiring lines of Rudyard Kipling’s famous poem, If:
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too
While not perfectly analogous to the current situation, I think the key message of this poem is to believe in your ability to deal with adversity. I have no doubt that your time at Crescent, whether you have just finished your first year (hello Grade 3s) or your tenth (hello, Grads) will instill in you a certain resiliency. It is this aspect of character that will empower you to deal with a wide range of issues throughout your life, and not just the one we are currently living through.
I wish you all the best.
